Urgent: Santa’s Elves Need Your Help!

The job market for elves at the North Pole has gotten tough in recent years. Advancements in technology have left many elves without the necessary skills to complete. Unless they receive additional training, many of them will be forced to step down from their long-held positions as toymakers and take jobs cleaning out those smelly reindeer stalls.

Back in olden times, working in Santa’s Shop only required a creative mind, a childlike heart, and a basic aptitude for things like carpentry, sewing, and working with metal. Armed with these skills, elves could make almost any toy a child could imagine:

  • Dolls that toddle and coo
  • Elephants
  • Boats
  • And kiddie cars, too.

But kids are a lot more sophisticated these days. They don’t want real toys anymore. They want tech-toys. Like Wii and XBox 360. Their Christmas lists no longer include items like rooty-toot-toots and rummy-tum-tums. Now they prefer to make all that noise with the Garage Band app on their iPad. Unless elves are retrained in newer technologies, the Toy Shop will close down in just a few short years, and Santa’s sleigh will sit empty on Christmas Eve. And that will be sad news indeed for our grandchildren.

So this year, we’re asking you to spare a moment out of your busy holiday schedules to remember all those wonderful elves who labored so hard to make every one of your Christmases merry and bright all these years.

But don’t send any money. They don’t use that stuff up at the North Pole.

Instead, just offer a smile, a kind word, or a helping hand to every person you meet during this holiday season. Each time you do, Santa will send one talented elf to the Tech Toy Training Academy. The more holiday cheer you give, the more elves there will be at the Academy, acquiring the skills they need to make every child happy for years to come.

It only takes a little extra effort on your part. So be good, for goodness sake.

Give big.

Give often.

Do it for the elves. Do it for the kids.

The future of Christmas depends on your generosity…


Too Grown Up

Signs that you’re too grown up:

When you can eat animal crackers without looking at the shapes.

When you are tending gardens instead of picking flowers.

When you can wait to open your presents.

When you think you’re too big to sit in God’s lap.

Tiny Prayers

No matter where you are in the world, it’s likely that
Somewhere a child is praying for you…

Little kids are much better at praying than adults. It’s all pretty simple to them. They start with “God bless Mommy and Daddy”, then proceed to ask God to bless everyone else around the world – including, but not limited to:

brothers and sisters
grandmothers and grandfathers
aunts and uncles

They even ask God to bless those starving children in Africa we told them about so they’d eat their veggies (which are getting colder by the minute, if this is the dinner blessing).

Often during these sustained soliloquies, we grown-ups find ourselves with one eyelid up, hoping to catch the young intercessor’s attention long enough to transmit the “hurry up” sign. Of course, those innocent eyes are shut tight from our outside interference. Meanwhile, that tiny tongue shows no signs of flagging. But you know something?

No matter how long they pray, or how many people they pray for – seems those sweet little buggers never ask a single thing for themselves.

Who taught them to pray like that?

And when did my simple childhood prayers of “God bless us everyone” morph into “Oh Lord won’t You buy me a Mercedes-Benz“?